[365/365] - a photo on Flickriver

[365/365]

            Today was...a good day.

I've spent a lot of it wandering around the city. The Cultural Center, the Bean, to Eataly, and back. The end of the decade/year seemed like it warranted some reflecting, and that's what I set out to do.

Let's just cover 2019 today, though - since it seems most-relevant.

2019 was an uncertain and gratitude-filled road of learning. Life, and the universe, decided to teach me more about myself than I think I even realize. I learned the value of surrounding yourself with those that you truly love, and letting others go. I went through periods where I said yes to everything - dates, plane tickets, cheese, last minute plans - and periods where I holed myself up in my house and napped on the couch with the dog. I'm not sure I did a great job balancing those two things, but I'd say it turned out ok.

My friends have continued to be the best friends in the entire world, and for this, I am endlessly grateful. They encourage me, call me on my bullshit, and somehow - never stop reminding me that they're there. Feeling loved, appreciating each other, being grateful for the simple existence of someone else - it's priceless - and at one point in my life, something that I didn't think was in the cards.

2019 taught me that a lot people are going to be scared of fierce independence, but it's allowed me to take the best solo-trip to London, and it isn't something to apologize for. I felt well enough to walk 82 miles over those 5 days, and had the best GF pizza of my life in a hole in the wall in suburban London.

I cried on a beach in October. I cried walking through a field to Stonehenge. And I cried eating a croissant sitting on a bench in front of Buckingham Palace with the Eiffel Tower to my left in the distance. And at the end of the Thanksgiving Day parade, in my co-workers-turned-family's house in NJ over GF cinnamon rolls, kid squeals, and silliness. And I cried a lot in the car, but what else is new.

I took a road trip to NJ for Thanksgiving, escaped to Door County for a random weekend in April, and spent 2 unforgettable 24 hour chunks in Michigan. 

I jumped out of an airplane, crossing a 2005 item off my bucket list.
I had the honor and joy of photographing one of my most dear friend's happiest elopements in NYC.
I finally went to the State of Liberty.
I made new grown-up friends.
Hugged a lot of old ones.
My phone tells me I walked an average of 2.7 miles per day.
I went on some pretty lackluster dates, and one really fantastic one.
Spotify is telling me I listened to 111,804 minutes (77.6 days) of music.
I starting writing again, a lot.
I also ate, a lot.
I had my first (second, third, and fourth) croissant ever.
I planted a garden and grew over 30 cucumbers and 500 cherry tomatoes.
I got another tattoo.
I had some rough days where all I could do was drive, and some beautiful days where I couldn't stop smiling to myself.

I'm still not sure why a lot of things happen, or don't happen, or happen differently than we expect them. But I also spent a lot of time being grateful for whatever does happen. It's humbling, and most of the time? That perspective can make my heart feel like it's going to burst. I've been trying to remind myself to love harder/more/bigger/stronger. Keep your feet on the ground. Keep showing up and loving (a lot). Giving. Listening. Talking. Hugging. Walking. Crying. Whatever you need to do. We're lucky to be doing this whole life thing, and it can be magical and challenging and frustrating and scarybeautiful and so, so fleeting - all at the same time. 

Like the lady in the Eataly bathroom said today: we're all in this together. 
   

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Taken on: December 31, 2019

Sets appears in: • from 2019 (v8), with love. • T3i. more » • //artsy. • people taking pictures of people. « less

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