Day 117 - I've spent so much time hiding how I feel. Now I want to be in the spotlight, and I want to make people listen to me.

            I like how this turned out ^^ Got it on the first try, too. I'm proud of myself, haha.
Anywho- Okay, I have to say something. I guess it can turn into a long something, haha. So, before me and DV started dating, he told me that he smokes. I don't have a problem with that. I really don't because I'm around it so much, I don't care. My father smokes pot, my friends, my brother... I don't care as long as they don't offer it to me. But today at school, before homeroom, I was sitting with him and his friends when a guy came over. They started talking casually about something I had no clue about, and they reached under the table. I heard crinkling and thought I knew what it was. I tried to ignore it, but then after the guy left and put probably money in his back pocket... He started talking about the amount and shit. He showed it to his friends under the table and then when I looked over, he had this... pretty decent sized bag of pot in a plastic bag. 
And god, did it REAK. Now, I was leaning on DV, so I could really smell it. Even after he put it in his pocket! I was afraid that I was going to smell like pot. And, I don't know what to do. My friend "Maria" smelled me and said I had nothing to worry about though. I mean, I don't want to tell him about it because then it will be going back on my word of, "I don't care if you smoke". But as "Maria" said, there's a difference between actually smoking, and seeing a transaction happen IN FRONT OF YOU. Which is true. 
*sigh* I just... I dunno. I mean, I could tell him to warn me first, but whatever. As long as he doesn't offer it to me, I'm cool. Because once he does that, we have a problem. He knows that though. 
Well anyway. Karate was good, and then afterwards I went to Burger King to see DV and get some foods =p. I haven't had BK in soooo long. It tasted good ^^ Super Size Me made me have a craving for BK.. ^^

"We live and we learn and crash and we burn and were gone
We take what we know and we learn as we go and we run

Run until that day
We can see who we are
Have the final say
We keep being who we are
As love lights the way to the last day
And no one can take it away

Run and hide (run and hide)
Don't hide at all (don't hide at all)
Change is coming, no it's nothing personal
Live our lives (live our lives)
Now hide it all (now hide it all)
Change is coming, no it's nothing personal

We live and we learn and we crash and we burn and we're gone
(We live and we learn and we crash and we burn and we're gone)
We take what we know and we learn as we go and we run

Run until that day
We can see who we are
Have the final say
We keep being who we are
As love lights the way to the last day
And no one can take it away

Run and hide (run and hide)
Don't hide at all (don't hide at all)
Change is coming, no it's nothing personal
Live our lives (live our lives)
Now hide it all (now hide it all)
Change is coming, no it's nothing personal..."
("Hide Nothing" by Further Seems Forever) Pretty good song.
   

Taken on: March 25, 2009

Tags:

spent

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how

feel

spotlight

people

make

listen

self

365

hand

cover

face

blue

eyes

uh-oh

first

try

proud

yay

smoke

pot

don't

care

transaction

front

morning

school

before

father

brother

friends

guy

money

bag

big

amount

2G's

reak

smell

scared

bothered

maybe...

burger

king

yummy

beef

food

I spent all history class thinking about this... What if he does offer it?

I don't want things to get rocky because of it. « less

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Camera: Nikon D60, f/5.3, 1/125 sec, 45mm, ISO 100 (more info) (hide info)

Camera:	Nikon D60
Aperture:	f/5.3
Exposure Time:	0.008 sec (1/125)
Focal Length:	45mm
ISO:	100
Exposure Bias:	0 EV
Flash:	Auto, Fired, Return detected
Exposure Program:	Not Defined
Metering Mode:	Multi-segment
Color Space:	Uncalibrated
Software:	Picasa 3.0
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